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Girls Gone Wild Blog

5 THINGS THAT DRIVE CHICKS WILD

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Women are a complicated species. What works for one chick doesn’t always fly with the next. So to help out all the struggling dudes out there we asked the chicks who appear in Girls Gone Wild put together a short list of things that are guaranteed to drive her crazy. Here’s what they said:  Read More….

 

 1. I like when you’re greedy during sex.

“And by this I don’t mean I like it when you shove your cock in my mouth and that’s all we do for an hour-and-a-half. By this I mean you only do what feels good and turns you on, not what you think turns me on. I don’t want you to touch me because you think it makes me feel good, I want you to touch me because it gets you hard, because you need to and want to. What turns me on is knowing that you’re getting off doing what you’re doing. Sex isn’t about just you or just me–it’s about making a physical connection together.”

 

2. It really is adorable when you make awkward attempts to enjoy the things that I enjoy, or take part in the things I do.

“Once you found out I was a writer, you began using big words (no doubt dug up from an old thesaurus you hadn’t touched since your junior year of college) in a clunky, if not incorrect, manner. You began reading Flaubert and would bring up his “ebullient” use of imagery in everyday conversations. After I told you I loved surrealism you brought over a big book of modern art and flipped through it, head cocked, eyes squinting, pondering Dali’s gravity-defying elephants on stilts. You would mutter things like “great use of color,” and “I love the irony here.”

 

3. It kind of turns me on when you flirt with other girls, so long as no boundaries are crossed.

“In my sick little mind I imagine you fucking her right in front of me. Maybe I get excited at the opportunity to exert my ownership and mark my territory. Maybe jealousy is an untapped aphrodisiac. But the thought of you with another girl makes me want to take you to my bedroom and do naughty things to you all night long.”

 

4. I like when you take me to amusement parks and scary movies and smell like baby powder.

“Research shows that our feelings of love and attachment increase after sharing a thrilling experience, like riding Superman the Escape at Six Flags or seeing a creepy horror flick. Research also shows that the scent of baby powder is a big turn-on for women. Why? I don’t know. Because it reminds us that we want to make babies? Anyway, it can’t hurt. Just don’t load the stuff on too heavy or I’ll know what you’re doing and think you’re a creep.”

 

5. When you tell me to take my vitamins and quit smoking.

“That’s way more romantic than that half-assed teddy bear-holding-a-fake-rose thing you picked up at the Mobil One The Run. What in god’s name am I supposed to do with shit like that? Put it in a shoebox and cherish it forever? Um, no thanks. Listen, giving me useless crap says “I wanna bone you tonight.” Showing concern for my health says “I wanna bone you tonight.” Showing concern for my health says, “I wanna bone you for years to come.””

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